As a contrast to Saturday's thoughtful, tediously crafted and terribly serious post, here is another Most Excellent Joke™ courtesy of the Junior Ricardipi.*
I've told this one before, but it's an absolute classic, so here it is again.
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Monkeysaurus.
Monkeysaurus who?
Monkeysaurus BANANA!!!
[gales of laughter]
Classic, I tell you.
*In this context, the term "most excellent" does not necessarily mean exactly what most people would think it does.
17 comments:
How do you make a sausage stand?
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Steal its chair.
It's rubbish I know...
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?!?
Banana.
Banana who (for crying out loud)?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?!?!?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you tired of hearing me say banana?
Har har har. From the junior 'Theas.
I will not do the Ether Bunny joke as it's too long.
I disagree with the statement that "most excellent" does not have it's usual meaning here.
lzwnsoyq - A new age milk supplement made from mown grass.
Please remove the extraneous apostrophe from that last comment, so my good pedant self can sleep. Ta.
i think i'll get Q to explain the joke to me.
zoe - Q might just understand it. I suspect it's about his level.
Bob - ha ha ha ha ha. Rubbish, yes, but good with it nonetheless.
Alethea - HA HA HA HA HA. Well done those 'Theas.
Dawn - apostrophe mentally removed. Now we both can sleep easy.
Hm, isn't it about time for Rik and John.G to weigh in with off-colour jokes?
"Knock knock"
"Who's there?
"Oh, you've heard it..."
/coat.
Nope, don't get that one.
Two statues stood in a city park: one female and the other male. These statues faced each other for many years.
Early one morning, an angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire."
And with that command, the statues came to life. The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling, and twigs snapping.
After fifteen minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling.
Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have fifteen minutes. Would you like to continue?"
The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"
Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure. But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on its head!"
HA HA HA AH AH AHA HAH AHAAHAAA!!!!!!!
Excellent.
Did you think they were doing something else? Be honest...
Hmm, I'm trying to remember some other jokes, but I've misplaced them.
A drunk guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don't feel so tough now, do you, Batman!?"
Hey, I saw a car on the way home that made me think of you and your penchant for sports cars. Do you know what kind of car is a Tuscani?
An RCMP officer notices that a truck driver is knitting as he's driving down the highway. He pulls up alongside the 18-wheeler and shouts, "Pullover!"
Truck driver shouts back, "No! Cardigan for the wife!"
/gets needles
Dawn - that were horrible, that were. Well done.
Debi - 'tis a Hyundai Tiburon by another name. Not too expensive but quite speedy for a cheap sports car. A perennial favourite of the street racing, flashy rims and big wings on the back crowd.
Also one of the most stolen cars in North America, apparently.
Apparently it's quite popular with the tailgating sort, too, because that's where I saw it--quite close in my rear view mirror...
That reminds me. We passed a Mazda Astina on the way to work today. The Black Queen says "That's a hairdresser's car!"
So I told her that I know a girl who drives one. . .
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