Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Um

Another find in the patent literature:

11. A method to provocatively test for schizophrenia in a human comprising administering S-(N,N-diethylcarbamoyl)glutathione to the human and correlating the induction of a hallucination in the human with schizophrenia.

Now that seems like a bad idea - diagnosing schizophrenia by causing a potentially schizophrenic patient to have a hallucination. Although I suspect that were this to become standard medical practise, an awful lot of people might show up at their doctors' offices claiming to be schizophrenic.

Nothing, however, beats this classic, entitled "Semen taste-enhancement dietary supplement", US patent #6,485,773, which you can find here. From the summary:

This invention regards a novel and unobvious dietary supplement formulation of relatively specific ratios of fruits, vegetables, and spices that when ingested by the male results in a significant improvement to the taste of the male ejaculate by reducing its generally salty and/or bitter taste while also adding a pleasant flavor that is considered by 98.5% of all customers as very enjoyable.

It goes on to point out that:

No negative effects were experienced by any in the market-test group nor by any of the thousands of customers who have used this product, thus far.

See? There is good science in the patent databases. You just have to dig for it.

8 comments:

john.g. said...

First!

So, what does it taste like?

#Debi said...

Ooh, I just thought of a really bad, punny, comeback that sounds like "bubble gum"...

The Wrath of Dawn said...

And apparently, it's not hard to find.

*snicker*

Ricardipus said...

I'm intrigued by Debi's comeback...

Dawn - apparently not. You just have to look hard.

*snicker*

Wonderferret said...

Can I S-(N,N-diethylcarbamoyl)glutathione at the supermarket and does it come in butterscotch flavour ?

WV: tugnns: brand name for the flavour enhancing pills.

TRT said...

Sex in the City has so, so much to answer for.

Asparagus. That is all.

Ricardipus said...

TRT - only if you have the right metabolizer phenotype.

/geek

Heather said...

Ok I have to ask the obvious. Why are the *customers* (who I would think are the ones buying and taking the supplements) able to give an opinion on the "pleasant flavor" of the ejaculate? Bleargh