Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Vacation, part I

In lieu of a topical post, you get this.

Once upon a time, Mrs. Ricardipus and I went on a Caribbean vacation. This, of course, was before either of the Junior Ricardipi arrived. Nowadays - vacation? Um, no.

We went to Antigua, a lovely country that "has an economy based solely on tourism".

Warning bell: the functional translation of "has an economy based solely on tourism" is "everyone will try to sell you anything at all, all of the time, and bother you until you are parted with at least some of your money".


Worst things about Antigua:

1) Everyone trying to take your money. All the time.

2) Sunstroke (our fault).

3) Crap beach and silty water caused by construction of nearby resort annex.

4) Missing our friends, who'd been in the same resort the week before, without our knowledge. Their postcard was waiting for us when we got back.

5) Frightening, enormous spiders in holes near the beach.

6) Finding out later that they were actually crabs, making us look (and feel) like idiotic tourists.

7) Extortionate and inefficient cab drivers, and active discouragement from taking the local bus service, which we found out later was apparently both cheap and convenient.

8) British West Indies Airlines - second-hand Air Canada planes, insecticide spray (on the way south - what, they think Canadian mosquitoes are going to invade the Caribbean?), "hint-o-fishstick" (southbound) and "particularly nasty omelette" (northbound) for dinner. And the broken seat that wouldn't stay vertical.

9) Aggressive "red caps" at the airport, ready to move your bags the 10 yards or so from the curb to the check-in desk. And take your money.

10) "Eastern Caribbean Dollars", i.e. monopoly money that cannot be used outside the Caribbean and can only be exchanged for U.S. dollars at exorbitant rates.

11) Cancelled glass-bottom boat/snorkeling and sunset catamaran cruises.

12) Mesh around the trunks of the palm trees to stop the rats from climbing them and subsequently falling to their deaths on the pathways through the resort.

Gosh, sounds bad doesn't it? Stay tuned for the plus side.


Alethea said...

Ha! I had exactly the same feeling about Grenada. My mom inherited some money about 15 years ago and dragged me (not unwilling) on a cruise that stopped there, among other places. It was unpleasant to be constantly accosted for money for this, that and the other whilst on the beach, and to be subject to the guilt associated with being sufficiently well-off to be on this cruise anyhow. Their "economy" at the time, thanks to Reagan, was based on selling packs of spices to tourists on the beach or braiding their hair. The other islands we visited were much more pleasant and their residents appeared to have other occupations as well as harassing the obnoxious tourists. And we were already equipped with USD.

How on earth have you gotten up to nearly 5000 posts on the Scienceboard forums (fora?!)?

Ricardipus said...

Argh. I forgot about the hair-braiding thing.

5,000 posts on the SAB? Laziness, pure laziness. Also being a huge loudmouth helps.

Nice to hear from you... for whatever reason I *still* can't post comments on your SAB blog, although I love reading it.

The Wrath of Dawn said...

Hey, nothing wrong with a retrospective post from time to time. Scaryduck depends on them.

The Wrath of Dawn said...

While I seem to be constantly busy but have nothing blogworthy... go figure.

Perhaps I could write about my inability to refrain from hitting the Enter key too soon...

#Debi said...

Dawn: Just write about anything, even if it's really, really wrong. It's what Scary would do...

Perhaps we should make up some WWSD T-shirts... :^D

krtbvle: a Scottish dish made from chopped up sheep bits...

Rik said...

WWSD: What Would Scary do? Who Would Shag Dawn? White was seasonal darkness?

wv: vionrfru - A recently made up acronym.

The Wrath of Dawn said...

Oh, Rik.

The Wrath of Dawn said...

*taps fingers impatiently*

And where, exactly, is the Vacation, part II post? Hmm? HMMM???

You're readers can only remain in a state of bated breath for so long before we all pass out.